Welcome to the blog tour for ALL THAT’S BEEN SAID, the second book in the young adult contemporary, The Carlington Twins Duet, by Emma Doherty. See below for information on the book, buy links, an exclusive excerpt, and details on her giveaway.
About the Book – Read for Free with Kindle Unlimited
Title: ALL THAT’S BEEN SAID
Series: The Carlington Twins Duet #2
Author: Emma Doherty
Release Date: November 7, 2019
Genre: Young Adult Contemporary
Links: Goodreads | Amazon | Amazon UK | Amazon CA | Amazon AU | Amazon DE | Amazon FR
Izzy Kavanagh’s life falls apart when her mother dies. She is forced to move to the US and live with her absent father, who thinks money is the answer to every problem, and her twin brother Ethan, who she has barely spoken to in years.
She hates everything about the move. She hates that she’s forced to finish high school even though she’s already completed it in the UK. She hates that her father is controlling her and threatening to take away her inheritance if she doesn’t do as he says, even though he’s barely there and couldn’t care less about her. She hates that everybody already has an opinion on her based on her family name.
But what she hates above all else is having to see her brother every day in his perfect life where everybody worships him, because he chose this life over her and her mum.
And for that, she’ll never forgive him.
We sit in silence for the next twenty minutes, both of us lost in our own thoughts, watching what’s happening in the distance. Ms. Joot’s words about confiding in someone keep playing on a loop in my head and despite mine and Finn’s issues and arguments I know that I can trust him.
Eventually I turn to him. “I wish Ethan had been there, in the last few months of her life…at the end.”
“He wishes that too, Izzy. You know he does.”
I shake my head. “No, you don’t get it.”
He doesn’t get at all just how badly I let my mum down. How I missed all the signs.
Out of the corner of my eye, I see him turn his head to face me, but I don’t look at him. I can’t look at him right now.
“She was sick for months before she went to the doctor,” I admit, my heartbeat hammering in my chest and the shame running through me. “She was run-down and tired, and she’d started to lose weight. I knew she wasn’t well. I knew she needed to go to the doctor, but she didn’t go, and I didn’t make her. I let her put it off and was happy for her to pick me up from school or take me shopping or cook my dinner rather than marching her down to the doctor’s office.”
A tear slides down my face.
“Ethan wouldn’t have missed it like I did. He wouldn’t have been as selfish as me. He would have put her first, would have known it wasn’t just some stupid flu thing.”
Another tear slides down my face. And another. I’ve never told anyone this before, never admitted it out loud.
“By the time she did make it there, it was too late. It was too far gone and they couldn’t do anything about it.”
I swipe at my face, wiping the tears away, and I take a deep breath and release what I’ve been holding inside me since my mum died. I don’t know why, but I want to tell Finn.
“I know I blamed Ethan for not being there when she died, but it’s my fault she was in that position in the first place, my fault it took so long for her to go to the doctor and have it diagnosed.”
My voice cracks and I start sobbing then, sobbing when I remember how devastated I was the day I found out she had cancer. How she promised me she was fine and she was going to fight it. How I believed it because my mum was the strongest person I knew and if anyone could beat cancer, she could.
Finn wraps his arms around me and hauls my body against him, hugging me so tightly I feel like I’m being welded into him. “It’s okay, Izzy. It’s okay.”
I cry against his shoulder for what feels like hours, remembering how shocked I was at her diagnosis, how devastated, how I handled it by disappearing on her and trying to forget about it, drinking and partying when I should have been there, by her side at all times of the day and night, reassuring her that she was loved.
Eventually I pull back, and our faces are so close I can see the flecks of gold in his green eyes.
“It’s not your fault, Izzy.”
Another tear slides down my cheek. “I could have done so much more.”
“Izzy, listen to me,” he says firmly. “There’s nothing you could have done.”
“I could have been there after. I could have talked to her and stayed in and stopped drinking and doing drugs trying to forget about it.” Another sob escapes as I remember how devastating that time was and how I couldn’t handle it. I didn’t know how to handle it so I just tried to forget, tried to bury the truth of what was happening until I couldn’t anymore, until she got so visibly sick that I didn’t dare leave the house in case something happened whilst I was gone. I remember how I helped her shower and begged her to eat when her appetite was gone, and when I remember that, I start to cry all over again.
“It’s not your fault,” Finn whispers over and over. “It’s not your fault.”
“What am I supposed to do without her?” I manage to choke out. “I’m a mess without her, and I don’t know how to fix any of this stuff with Ethan.” I take a deep shuddering breath. “I can’t do any of this without her.”
He doesn’t say anything in return. He doesn’t bullshit me and tell me it’ll be fine, doesn’t say I’ve not messed everything up and I’m not going to miss her every day of my life. Instead his face has so much sympathy and concern on it and it’s so, so personal that I can’t stand it any longer. I launch myself towards him, fusing my mouth to his and forcing my tongue between his lips.
He kisses me back. I swear he kisses me back, tightening his arm around my neck and pulling me closer, pressing my body against his, but he only does that for about five seconds before he’s pushing me away and detangling himself from me.
“No,” he tells me breathlessly. “No, not like this. Not like this.”
Humiliation washes over me as I realise I’m being rejected, realise I was completely wrong and there hasn’t always been this strange vibe between us. I immediately stand to leave but he grabs my hand, gripping it tightly, not letting me go. I try my best to pull my hand out of his grip, desperate to get away from him, but he holds on tightly, tugging me back sharply. Still, I manage to twist away and I take off running down the path, not stopping when he calls after me and taking off down a different path because I can’t stand the thought of passing Ethan and his friends or seeing any of Finn’s family. No, I take off down a completely different path and then half-run, half-walk the whole way home.
About the Author
Emma Doherty was born in Yorkshire, England. She attended university in Newcastle before moving to London. She loves to travel, write, spend time with friends and family and hear from her readers.
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